Opposites Attract
September 30th, 2026
Writer: Nicolina Kane
Editor: Sophia Wohl
There are so many factors that play into “dating” as a college girl, especially when it comes to fitting them into your lifestyle. You ask yourself: does this person go out on the weekends, or do they live near my hometown or even in the same state? One question I have fixated over for the last few years of meeting people here at school has been “are they anything like me?”
“Are they anything like me?” I wonder as a girl with very niche interests and passions. A girl who is some would say overly friendly and outgoing. A girl who is never shy nor embarrassed. A girl who thrives in large crowds and loud environments. A girl who is involved in so many extra curriculars and part time jobs that she barely has time to breathe!
But- the same girl asking this question when talking to a potential love interest, is also a girl who does want to find a secure and healthy connection. Sometimes we need to look at the bigger picture and see how another individual could compliment me while also not being "anything like me.”
I never believed people when they would say “opposites attract.” I felt growing up that I had always gravitated towards people who were very similar to me: loud, outgoing, carefree, driven etc., but I learned throughout my three years at Ohio State, that so many of my best friends come from different sides of the country, different religions, different majors and so much more. So, if this can work in a friendship, it must be able to carry into a romantic relationship.
I found that when talking to guys- I naturally compare myself to them and run to my friends screaming “we have so much in common.” The things we had in common were usually extremely basic; we both like country music, we live in the same apartment complex, our fraternity and sorority often mix or they have a younger sister. I would fixate so hard on these very simple things that it naturally created a false narrative in my head that we were meant to be. But nine times out of ten, these boys shared no values with me.
Like I said earlier, I am very outgoing and far from shy, so I typically talk to guys who give off that same energy. This would start off strong and electric, until it would become too much to the point where we would no longer see eye to eye. When recently reflecting with my mom about my college dating, I told her “I am tired of competing with a man for the pedestal.” Meaning, I am tired of competing with a guy for who's the friendlist, who's the most known or liked, who likes country music more… I want be looked at and have a man say “I love how friendly you are… I love how much you love country music.” I learned it is more important for someone to ask questions and learn about your interests that they may not share rather than compare who loves it more.
Now, I am not saying it is a bad thing to have the same interests as the boy you like, but take a step back to take in if your values and virtues align. If you believe there is a guy that you met that takes you to dinner because he wants to, opens the door for you, fixes your purse strap when it's falling off your shoulders, gives you their jacket without you asking but you have zero things in common, I say learn about what he likes. Listen to him nerd out over his major you know nothing about, because he will want to do the same for you, even if he is not “anything like you.”
